In the big picture, 90 days is just a tiny blip on the timeline of my life. A small fraction of the days I have spent here on earth, and hope to spend in the future. But when you’re in the midst of something really challenging, or when you’re waiting for something, 90 days can feel like an eternity.
Ninety days ago I began an experiment, set-out on a small journey, to see what it would be like to practice intentional gratitude every day for three months. I wish I could tell you that this challenge got easier the longer I did it. That, like working out or going to bed early, once I made the commitment and stuck to it for a month or two it became routine. But the truth is, finding something to be grateful for has often been difficult. Once I got through the obvious ones (my kids, my husband, my job, etc.) I had to really examine my world to find something new each day, made more challenging on the really hard days.
Unfortunately, the last 90 days have not been a season where things just seem to fall into place, and life flows along at a normal pace. It’s been a really, really hard three months in so many ways — emotionally, spiritually, relationally, financially, physically, etc. In fact, as I was writing this post my husband informed me that the dealer called…our SVU needs over $6,000 in repairs. *sigh* The hard continues.
But here’s what I’ve learned in this season, while doing this experiment:
God wants our gratitude and praise, even when we seem in short-supply of praise-worthy things.
Of course it’s easy to be thankful for all we have once per year, when looking around at the sum total. And of course it’s easy to be grateful when sickness is healed, and bills are paid, and the house is clean, and marriages are strong, and children are happy. But if we are only able to express gratitude when we feel blessed, then we have misunderstood the complexity and abundance of God’s love and provision.
In Philippians, Paul tell us to: “Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” (Philippians 4:4-6)
What really gets me about this scripture is how much Paul repeats himself in just three verses. Twice he tells us to rejoice. Then he emphasizes the frequency in which we should rejoice and be thankful, saying “always” and “in every situation.” His main point is pretty clear. Paul doesn’t say to rejoice only when things are good. He doesn’t say to speak with thanksgiving only in the month of November. He says to do these things all of the time because “the Lord is near.”
And that’s it! That’s the only reason we need. The only catalyst to feel gratitude or to live a life of thanks and praise is God’s presence in our lives.
This is what the last 90 days have taught me. That when I stop and look, I can see God’s presence in my life every day.
When I am exhausted and worn down from the events of the day, I can see His presence in the quiet minutes after I crawl into bed.
When I’m stressed about financial burdens, I can see His presence in my daughter opening her first savings account and earning her own money.
When I’m filled with worry and anxiety over my son, I can see God’s presence in my son’s smile while tossing the football with his dad.
When life feels messy, and hard, and overwhelming, I can see God’s presence in a group of friends gathered in our living room, praying together.
So for 90 days this has been my objective, to find these moments, this evidence of God’s presence. As I already admitted, it hasn’t been easy. Many times I’ve been distracted by my own wants and worries and fears, and I’ve had to really work to see past this, to see God.
But He is steadfast. He is always near.
So I’m gonna keep on looking. I’m going to keep praising Him. I’m going to keep on coming to Him with thanksgiving, “in every situation.”
Even when it’s hard. Especially when it’s hard.
#90daysof Thanksand Giving
This is the conclusion of my 90 day challenge. To read about how it all began, click here.