Category: Marriage

The first step toward forgiveness and restoration

[The following is an excerpt from my book Forgiven and Restored.] DEAR READER, YOU MAY BE WONDERING what it is that makes me such an expert on forgiveness and restored relationships. Why should you read this book and take my advice? Well, I don’t claim to be an expert by any means, but I do know what it’s like to be in your shoes. I know what it’s like to live with indescribable pain and loss and feel like you

Why didn’t you leave?

couple holding hands

Why didn’t you leave? It’s a question that I get asked every now and again –more often than I would like — from people who learn the story of my marriage. My initial reaction is to get defensive, angry even. Especially when the question comes from friends who know my husband and me intimately. But then I think, “maybe they don’t know because my reasons are not the world’s reasons.” So here it is. To set the record straight. To

Beauty from the ashes: A look at marriage after infidelity

couple walking in the woods

We were married five years when I found out my husband had been unfaithful. He had also been hiding an addiction to pornography that he’d secretly struggled with for many years, before we even met, which had led to a night that would change our marriage forever. Although I thought I knew what I would do if ever faced with that situation, the truth is none of us really knows until we are knee deep in the pain and brokenness

My soul is crushed

crushed in spirit

He told them, “My soul is crushed with grief to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me.” (Matthew 26:38) I had the privilege of teaching the message at our church this past Sunday. The message was on Jesus’s prayer in the Garden of Gethsemane. I love this story. Oh, I know that might sound strange. After all, it’s not an uplifting passage, like the Sermon on the Mount or one that demonstrates Jesus’s mighty power, like

Does he know?

Does he know?

Today marks 17 years married to this guy. It’s been nearly 21 years since our fist date…officially together for more of my life than not. It’s crazy to think about. Last week I was thinking about what I wanted to say about 17 years of marriage with the only man I’ve ever loved. I had this nice story I was going to tell about the antique rocking chair he gave me when our first child was born, how it’s been

When marriage feels hard

married couple

I recently read an article by Joanna Gaines talking about her marriage to her husband Chip (hosts of the show “Fixer Upper”, among other things). In the article she talked about how she has never wanted to go on a girl’s weekend or spend time away from her husband, how being with him gives her energy and she thrives on their togetherness. I believe she is being sincere when she says that, and Chip and Joanna Gaines are an adorable

When love leads, truth follows

love leads

From the beginning my intent for this blog has been to spread hope, encouragement and love. Because of this, I have purposely chosen not to write about controversial topics. Believe me, it’s not that I don’t have my own opinions about wars and politicians and Duggars and SCOTUS rulings. In many cases I have very strong opinions; but I find that the thing that makes a topic controversial to begin with is its power to divide people, and where there is

A letter to my daughters on their wedding day

wedding dress

It was a beautiful, blue-skied, May day. We sat in the historic church surrounded by gilded marble, a painted cathedral ceiling, and stunning artwork all around. Fresh flowers adorned the alter and a row of handsome young men stood at the front. One by one the bridesmaids made their way down the aisle and then the doors opened and the stunning bride appeared. I saw the huge grin spread across her groom’s face as he saw her for the first

What love looks like to me

two hearts in sand

Two years ago I had the pleasure of traveling to Sydney, Australia for my job. Not knowing when, or if, I’d ever get back I tacked on two days to my trip to do a little sightseeing. As I’ve traveled quite a bit for my job I’ve gotten used to being bold and venturing out on my own, but this time I went ahead and signed up for one of those pre-planned tours that would take me up into the Blue Mountains and a chance to experience what lie beyond Sydney.

The secret to a long and happy marriage

married couple

OK, so now that I’ve lured you in with a juicy title I have to come clean. I don’t really believe there is one big, secret formula to a long and happy marriage. It’s way too complex for that, and anyone that tells you differently is trying to sell you something. Besides, I’ve only been married for 14 years. While that may seem like a lifetime in today’s society, it’s by no means my definition of a long marriage. However, I